indigo_angels

Face sighed and tuned the van’s radio to another station. The bland pop he’d been listening to for the past half hour had finally turned his brain to mush and he was hoping to find something with a little more bite and some more useful traffic reports. He hadn’t moved a metre in the last thirty minutes and the traffic reports he’d been listening to provided nothing more than the length of the jam he was sitting in; no reason why, and more importantly, no idea as to when he would finally get moving.

He switched the engine off and kicked his seat back a little, straightening his legs out and knitting his fingers behind his head to stretch his arms. He was as tense as all hell, and he knew it, there was so much going on in his head and he just didn’t know where to start to try and sort it all out.

Jessie for starters; the more he thought about it, the more suspect her appearance in his life seemed. She was the one who had come to him in the Whiskey Sky, and then turned up again the night he was thrown out of that bar on the lake front. And why had she been so interested in him? God, he’d well and truly spilled his guts the other night in the hotel. What was all that about? Face never told anyone anything, and suddenly there he was, confessing all to an almost total stranger. What had he been thinking? If she’d been DCIS then he would be wrapped up nice and snug in the middle of some high security prison by now, never to see the light of day again. Where was all the caution that Hannibal had spent years pounding into him? And thinking of Hannibal, she’d certainly freaked when he’d said his name, there was no doubt there. So what was all that about? And she’d said something about knowing them better than he could guess, and of course she had called him Face, so that was obviously true...

It felt uncomfortably like she had been playing him the whole time, but why? To get into his bed? He didn’t think so, she’d certainly been a willing participant in the end, but she’d never flirted with him before that. To sell him out? Betray him to the MPs or one of the many enemies the team had amassed over the years? No. If that was the plan then she would have done it before now. So what was going on?

Face hated feeling he was out of the loop, and hated knowing that he’d brought this all on himself by letting his guard down too fast and too far, and that was annoying in itself, because he never did that. He bashed his fist against the window and realised he was even more tense now than ten minutes ago. This whole situation was crazy; the only thing for it was to sit Jessie down tonight and not let her move until she answered his questions. He rubbed his jaw thoughtfully and wondered just what question he should start with.

Suddenly the traffic announcements cut into his radio station and he turned the dial up to listen. Great. There was a multi-car pileup and the whole of the Dan Ryan Expressway was snarled up. He wasn’t going anywhere soon. Just excellent, Accrombo would love every second of this.

And that brought his thoughts back to what the hell he was doing here.

He cast his glance back through the mirror to the neat boxes stacked in rows behind him. Hair straighteners they said, or hairdryers. Some said styling tongs, and some of the boxes even contained what they were supposed to. But of course some didn’t, and Face knew damn well what was in those ones.

A sick churning started up in his stomach and he could almost hear Jessie’s voice in his head, ’He would be horrified if he knew what you were up to...’

Of course he would, and Face had always known that. And not just Hannibal either, but BA and Murdock too. Murdock hated<i/> drugs of any kind, they’d messed with his mind for so long now, he had every right, and BA had spent too many years living in neighbourhoods destroyed by drugs and the gangs they create to have much patience with people who contribute to their presence on the streets. People like him, he realised with shame.

And what did any of that matter anyway? Why should it come down to what his team thought about drugs? Hell, he certainly had no time for them at all! Living on the streets as he had, he’d seen daily the lives they could wreck, the promise and potential they could snuff out in a matter of hours. He’d sworn to himself when he was barely in double figures that he would never get sucked into that kind of life, he would never fall for the empty promises in a wrap of coke. It’s a shame he’d never included running in that vow...

So what was he doing here? ’Sometimes there just isn’t much choice...’ A pathetic excuse and one he knew he was just trying to fool himself with. He knew all about choices, he’d had to make some pretty horrific ones over the years, but he knew there was always an option; you just had to have the balls to take it.

So, that’s all he needed then, some balls; well, no one had ever accused him of lacking in that department. With barely a second’s pause, Face clicked off the radio and opened the driver’s door of the van, sliding out onto the side of the expressway. He walked round to the crash barriers at the side of the road and leaned over, perfect, straight down into the Chicago River.

He slid back into the driver’s seat, and in a manoeuvre BA would have been proud of, managed to edge the van around until it was almost perpendicular to the surrounding cars. Then, ignoring the bemused stares of his fellow drivers, he backed up as far as he could towards the car in the inside lane and made sure the shifter was in park. Flashing a grin at the leggy brunette in the roadster next to him he fished a lump of concrete from the roadside and weighed it in his hand. Satisfied, he stood in the doorway of the van, leaned in and pushed the shifter into drive, dropped the concrete block onto the gas pedal and stood back as the van surged forward, smashing through the barriers and pounding, engine screaming, into the black waters of the river.

He allowed himself just the slightest grin as he peered over the side at the mess he had created, then, as people surged from their cars, shock and incredulity written all over their faces, he vaulted over the central barrier, wove through a couple of lines of cars, swung himself up onto the concrete barricade at the edge of the interchange and dropped down onto the roof of a bus shelter on the sidewalk below. Grinning broadly at the old lady waiting there, he slipped through four lanes of traffic and then disappeared into the subway just as the first police bike was arriving on the scene.

Face’s good mood had evaporated by the time he arrived back at the W; he still had Jessie to deal with and he had to make plans to move on as well, Joey Pacitto would not be too thrilled to find one of his shipments at the bottom of the Chicago River...

So he showered, packed up, and at 7pm precisely took the elevator up to the Whiskey Sky. Once settled at their usual table, he ordered a diet coke, angled himself towards the doorway, anger simmering gently just under his skin, and waited.

By 2.30am his annoyance had long since disappeared, replaced instead by gut wrenching dread, and he knew that if he ever looked at another bottle of diet coke again in his entire life it would be too soon. He finally took the hint from the long suffering barkeep who had wiped his table over about eight times in the last twenty minutes and reluctantly left the bar.

Face had a fairly good radar for situations like this, Hannibal had long since learnt to go with his gut instincts that something was wrong, and he knew that this was much more than Jessie standing him up. All the things that had been niggling him about her came back to plague him, along with memories of how spooked she’d looked last night, how she hadn’t wanted to stay in the bar, how she’d looked positively terrified when she realised Face was going back to Accrombo that morning, but now he realised that they all fitted together.

He opened the door to his suite and slipped inside; making sure the door was locked and chained behind him. Then he wandered over to the window and stared out into the darkness, wondering what his next move should be. He suddenly felt very alone again, hadn’t realised how much he’d got used to Jessie being around.

A slight scuffling noise in the corridor made him freeze, and he found himself wishing for a nice solid firearm in his hand, an M9 would do just fine, but instead he picked up the solid glass ash tray from the table and crept to the door, sneaking a look through the peep hole.

He swore softly under his breath, dropped the ash tray on the carpet and quickly unlocked and unchained the door. Jessie was pale and obviously shaky, looking over her shoulder almost constantly as Face reached out and grabbed her by the coat dragging her into the suite and in to his arms. He held her close to his chest as he slammed the door behind her and slid the chain back into place, “Where the fuck have you been? I’ve been worried sick about you!”

“I’m sorry,” Jessie clung to him with her face buried in his shirt, “I’ve had some... trouble...”

Face steered her to the table and sat her down before reaching into the minibar and pulling out a random bottle, “Here.”

Jessie took it off him with shaking fingers and struggled to open it so he took it back and unscrewed the cap, pushing it back into her hand and waiting while she lifted it to her lips and downed the whole bottle in one.

When she’d finished she let the bottle fall to the floor and drew her feet up onto the chair in front of her wrapping her arms around her legs as if she was holding herself together and meeting Face’s eyes over her knees, “I am sorry...”

Face pulled a chair up and sat right on the edge, one hand on her shin, the other on her ankle, “I think it’s time that you talked to me.”

Jessie nodded and wiped her eyes on the back of her hand before reaching out and wrapping her hands over his, “I’ve not been exactly honest with you,” she whispered.

He raised his eyebrows and smiled thinly at her, “So I figured. You gonna put that right then?”

Jessie sighed, “Okay, well, my name isn’t Jessie Connors for a start, she was my best friend in college, much cooler than I ever was!” but Face didn’t return her weak laugh.

“So, what should I call you then?” his tone was decidedly cool.

“Jessie is fine, but I’m Jessica Gaarder.”

“Swedish?”

Jessie smiled, “Close. Norwegian. My father is anyway, my mother is American and we moved over here when I was two. Eight years ago my family moved back to Norway and asked me to go with them, but,” Jessie shook her head ironically, “well, suffice it to say I knew better, wanted to do things my way, so I stayed behind.”

Face reached round to squeeze her fingers, he could certainly relate to decisions like that.

Jessie squeezed back, “So anyway, I struggled to make a mark in anything much, ended up as a croupier, obviously met a guy...” another sad smile, “and I thought that was me sorted. He was rich and suave and handsome and kind and for a few months everything was great.” Jessie’s eyes drifted over to the window and she seemed to be looking out into the past.

“But?” Face prompted.

Turning back Jessie met his eyes, “But it turns out he was a complete nutcase, and I’m not talking the good kind of crazy,” she raised her eyes significantly, “I’m talking the terrifying, completely unpredictable kind of crazy. The kind where people who annoy you turn up chained to a pile of bricks at the bottom of Lake Michigan.” Jessie shuddered and Face squeezed her fingers again.

“So I decided I’d had enough, wanted out, but I’m not stupid,” she held Face’s eyes with her own and they were suddenly deadly serious, “I knew that if I left I wouldn’t last a week. And if I went back to my family like I wanted to, we would all be dead by the end of the month. They’d probably never even find our bodies.” Face was expressionless. “So I decided I needed some help, I went to the police, but I wasn’t interested in testifying against my boyfriend so they weren’t interested in helping me. Instead I went on the internet and found out about-”

“The A-Team...” Face interjected quietly. Of course.

Jessie smiled at him. “Yeah. You seemed the answer to my prayers; I had the money to pay you, just needed to find you.” She laughed ironically. “Seems, unfortunately, I picked the time that you and Hannibal had your... misunderstanding and you left. No wonder I couldn’t find you.”

“I’m sorry. I-”

Jessie leaned over and put her finger on his lips, “Shhh. I know you didn’t. I didn’t want to tell you all this, didn’t want to add to your pressures.”

He lifted her hand away and kissed her finger tips before sliding his hand into hers.

“But anyway, I did my research, found out as much as I could about you all, kept looking, hoping for some success. And then...” Jessie laughed now, a genuine happy laugh, “I saw you! I was just walking past the hotel outside, and you went straight past me! Came in here and checked in! I couldn’t believe it.”

Face smiled back at her.

“So I hung around all day until you went into Whiskey Sky and I followed you in there, determined I was going to approach you, check out hiring the whole team to get me out of this mess, but...” her face fell once more, “I sat and watched you all that night, and I could just feel how sad you were, it was like I was tuned right into you and suddenly my problem just wasn’t the most important thing in the world – making you happier was.”

Face blinked rapidly as his eyes suddenly started stinging and leaned forward to drop a feather light kiss onto Jessie’s lips. She slipped her hand up onto his cheek, “I determined that I wouldn’t bother you with any of my troubles until we’d sorted out yours, but...” her eyes and her hand dropped from his face.

“But what?”

“He’s been getting more and more suspicious all week, all the time I’ve been spending with you. He’s had me followed all day; I had real trouble getting away.”

“You sure you weren’t followed here?” She shook her head and Face nodded, “Jessie, you should have told me!” he admonished, “I’d have helped you, you know I would. I still will, both of us are getting out of here, right now. In fact,” he smiled a crooked smile at her, “I think I may have overstayed my welcome in Chicago.”

“So I’ve heard!” Face frowned but before he had chance to ask what she meant, Jessie had a question for him, “So, where are we going then? Back to Hannibal?”

Face felt his heart lurch at her words and his forehead creased in a frown. “No. Nothing’s changed there. That’s just not going to happen.”

“But, Face!” she leaned into him, “I could be just the excuse you need! You take me back to Hannibal as a client, and while you are doing whatever it is that you guys do, you can have some time to sort your differences! It’s perfect! Don’t you think?”

A stony silence met her words.

“Come on! Don’t you see what an opportunity this is?” Face looked away and Jessie missed the warning in his eyes, “You could be with him in two days, just two days and all this could be sorted and think how that would feel to see him again, to talk to him again, and-”

“No!” Face jumped to his feet turning back to Jessie and she was horrified to see tears standing in his eyes, “I can’t! I just can’t!” He closed his eyes and the tears broke free, running down his cheeks and reflecting the light from the skyline outside.

“Oh, honey...” Jessie was at his side in a moment, reaching up to wipe the tears away before they reached his jaw line.

Face looked at her, agony burning in his eyes, “I can never go back to him. I’m not saying won’t, I’m saying can’t!” He took a deep breath, eyes shining with fresh tears, “I’m absolutely downright terrified of what he will say, I’d rather live like this than have him reject me,” he shook his head hopelessly, “You think this is bad? If he sent me away I would die,” and the bleakness in his eyes tore at Jessie’s heart.

“He wouldn’t turn you down. Who could do that to you?”

Those blue eyes, so utterly devoid of any warmth, held her stare, “You want the whole list?”

And Jessie’s heart broke for him, suddenly realising just how deep his vein of insecurity ran. She reached up and pulled him in, hands smoothing over the muscles in his back, rigid with tension.

His arms wound around her, stroking her back, sliding around to her stomach, edging higher...

Jessie closed her eyes and hung on to his neck as the fire in her belly reawakened. He didn’t need this, she wasn’t what he needed, but how could she turn him away like this?

“Jessie?” he whispered into her hair.

“It’s okay,” she lifted her head and his lips brushed hers as she replied, “It’s all okay, no strings remember...”

_______________

Afterwards, Face held her in his arms as he surfed lazily through the post orgasm endorphins. They needed to get going, they really couldn’t get out of Chicago too fast for his liking, so where to go next...? Face had well and truly had enough of the cold, so what about Florida? Maybe, or, Arizona, yeah, that was better, nice dry heat!

He wondered if Jessie was asleep, she was certainly quiet. He’d give her another five minutes then they really should get going.

“How long have you known him?”

Jessie’s voice, clear and wide awake startled him and he glanced down at the top of her head. “Hannibal? I dunno exactly. A long time I suppose.”

Jessie stayed where she was, curled up on his chest, “According to my internet sessions you’ve served with him since you were eighteen. Plenty of time to get to know a guy.”

Face wondered where this was going. “Yeah, I’d say I know him inside out.”

“Is he a good commander?”

“The best.”

“And you trust him?”

“Implicitly.”

“You trust his decisions?”

“Always.”

“So...” Jessie wriggled a little at his side, “if you’ve had all that time to get to know him, then he’s had all that time to get to know you too, right?” Face frowned, “And if he has made the decision that he loves you, based on all those years of knowing you, how come you don’t trust him enough to let him prove it?”

Silence fell as Jessie’s words fluttered over Face’s skin. She lay still once more, her head on his chest, one hand absently stroking his ribs as the minutes ticked by and then, as Face shifted underneath her she sat up, resting one hand on the bed as she turned to look at him.

Face brushed a strand of hair back off her face and cracked a half smile, “Okay. You win. We go to Hannibal,” and the air was instantly knocked out of his lungs as Jessie threw herself at him.

“Oh, yes! Oh, Face that’s brilliant, I can’t believe you’ve seen sense at last!” she pulled back to beam at him and he found her optimism contagious.

Maybe she was right, and maybe this wouldn’t be another unmitigated disaster. Maybe.

He smiled cautiously back at her, “So, why so happy? What do you get out of this?”

Her response was immediate, “Oh, I get to see you happy, that’s all I’ve ever wanted for you!”

He frowned, “We’ve not even known each other a week...”

“I know,” Jessie’s expression morphed into one of confusion, “it’s crazy isn’t it? But your happiness is so important to me. It’s like you said, I feel like we’ve known each other forever. Hey!” her eyes brightened again, “Maybe we were like, twins!, in another life or something!”

At Face’s unsure expression Jessie blanched and threw a hand over her mouth, “Oh, God, no! I hope not, not after all this!” and she waved her hand expressively around the bed, and then gasped again, “Which all has to stop by the way! I’ll hardly be able to look him in the eye as it is, without us ever doing that again! I don’t care how damn irresistible you are, it stops!” she leaned over him to grab the phone.

Face laughed at the look of horror on her face, “Don’t worry about Hannibal; we’ve never really been exclusive, he won’t mind at all. And what are you doing?”

Jessie paused in the act of dialling to stare at him, “I’m ordering us some champagne from room service to celebrate you wising up. And he won’t mind? God, Face you really are clueless!”