Mission Five: Chapter 12 - “Something is bothering you. Something’s changed...”

Twenty minutes later, Face and Sasha slowly made their way round to the back of the property to where the other three were waiting with the car.

 

Sasha, quiet and subdued after a reaming out from BA and then Face, kept on shooting surreptitious glances to the way that Face had one arm pressed against his stomach, and the way he winced every time he needed to twist or bend.

 

BA was already in the driver’s seat, more than eager to get going and just get the hell out of Russia for good, Hannibal was sitting sideways on one of the back seats, long legs stretching out into the mud, bottle of water grasped in his filthy fingers talking quietly to Murdock who was leaning on the open car door. They turned as Face emerged from the shadows, Sasha in tow, and Sasha narrowed his eyes at the way that Face pulled himself up straighter, forced himself to walk faster.

 

Face moved straight to BA and gave him the GPS unit, “Right, I’ve called in the extraction, ETA is 0500, here’s the coordinates.”

 

BA nodded and took the items from Face’s hands, looking at them carefully, “No problem, LT,” he replied, his voice quiet in the night, “it’s about 60 miles from here, should give us loads of time as long as the roads are okay.”

 

“The roads are fine,” Sasha called from behind them, “You will make it in plenty of time.” He looked at Hannibal and pointed, turning back to Face as he spoke, “So, this your leader, then?”

 

Face smiled and nodded and Sasha walked up to Hannibal and stuck his hand out, “Pleased to meet you, sir,” he said, not a trace of humour anywhere on his face.

 

“How come he gets ‘sir’, and I got ‘dick-head’?” Face muttered under his breath as he made his way around the car to stand with Murdock and Sasha.

 

Murdock grinned at him as Hannibal extended his own hand and shook Sasha’s firmly. “Pleased to meet you too, young man,” he answered gravely, “and can I just thank you, and all your friends, for the way you have helped my team out here in the last few days.”

 

Sasha bristled, and looked at Hannibal through narrowed eyes, trying to see if he was being teased, but all he saw was genuine appreciation, “You are welcome,” he eventually responded, “but those two said I should have stayed away.”

 

Hannibal appeared to consider this for a moment before nodding, “Well, they are probably right, they were just trying to keep you all safe, but thank you, anyway. You were very brave.”

 

Sasha nodded in return, “Well, Face saved my sister, we had to help him get his boss back. He’s no good at being a leader on his own.”

 

Hannibal’s eyes snapped to Face and the way he shifted awkwardly at Sasha’s words. “Really?” he said thoughtfully, “It seems as though you and I have quite a bit of catching up to do, Face.”

 

Face shifted again and Murdock took pity on him, “Come on Sasha,” the pilot said, draping a hand around the boy’s back, “Let’s go and find the rest of your gang of reprobates, we need to say our farewells.”

 

BA pulled himself out of the car as well, following after them, as Sasha could be heard asking, “What’s a repro..., what was that word?”

 

Turning his eyes from the three retreating figures, Hannibal turned to watch Face. He was tense, obviously on edge even though the immediate threat to them all had been neutralised, for now. He wouldn’t look Hannibal in the eye, preferring to lean against the side of the car facing the same way, and was fidgeting with his gun, long fingers busy, always busy.

 

“Face,” Hannibal’s soft voice chipped into his thoughts, and he knew the boss would wait for him, wait until he turned his head and made eye contact. He looked up from under his lashes. “What’s going on, kid?”

 

“Nothing, boss!” he almost kicked himself, too loud, too bright, he needed to have been smarter than that if he was going to fool Hannibal.

 

With a sigh, Hannibal pulled himself to his feet and turned to stand in front of Face, filling his vision, trapping him against the car. A steady hand reached out and took hold of his chin, lifting it up, forcing their eyes to lock, “You know you don’t fool me,” Hannibal told him gently, “Now come on Face, what’s going on here?”

 

For just a moment, Face considered toughing it out, trying to brazen his way out of the situation, stick with his lie, but really what was the point? He sighed and forced himself to hold Hannibal’s gaze, “I’m not coming back with you, boss, not tonight.”

 

Hannibal was shocked, Face could see that and he felt bad, it took a lot to shock the boss, but his voice was steady still as he asked, “Why not?”

 

“Those kids, Hannibal,” the plea to understand was there in his voice, “How can I just walk out on them now? How can I leave them in the mess they are in?”

 

For a few minutes Hannibal didn’t speak and Face felt himself starting to squirm under that intense blue stare, “I know you better than any person alive or dead,” he eventually replied, a hand reaching out to hold Face’s arm. “And you telling me that you want to stay out here and try and fix it for these kids, then, yes, I get that. I more than get that, that’s you, kid. But...” he shook his head, “That’s not the problem here,” he narrowed his eyes and Face started to feel uncomfortably like specimen in a Petri dish. “Something is bothering you. Something’s changed...”

 

Face looked away, feeling himself flush. He was so damn obvious. The boss could see it in him now, the depths he’d sunk to to get the job done, the decisions he’d made, the lives he’d ended... They’d all tainted him and Hannibal could see it, could smell the stench of his choices so, so easily. Shame chewed him up from the inside out. How could he disappoint this man like that? The only man who had ever believed in him, who ever thought there was more to him than a quick forced blow job on his knees...

 

“Face...?”

 

He flicked his eyes back to the worry and concern and felt a surge of self loathing wash up within him. He couldn’t do this anymore, couldn’t stain Hannibal’s pureness with his filth. He pushed off from the side of the car, trying to shove away from that blue stare that was piercing right through his heart but Hannibal had anticipated him, already had a hand up, shoving at Face’s stomach, pushing him back into the car.

 

Face couldn’t stop the way his body clenched up in hot agony, and the groan that ripped from his lips at that pressure right on top of his bullet wound. He curled up on himself, knees sagging and collapsed onto the back seats, gritting his teeth at the flaring pain.

 

Taking one look at the blood on his hand from Face’s clothes, Hannibal dropped to his knees in the doorway of the car, grabbing at Face’s arms, trying to get him to unroll, to open up physically if not emotionally. “Jesus, Face, why don’t you ever tell anyone when you’re injured?!” He shook his head in frustration, “You wanted us to leave you out here, on your own, when you were hurt?”

 

“Why do you think I didn’t say anything?” Face hissed through clenched teeth, allowing Hannibal to unwrap his arms, peel his jumper away, lift up his vest and he bit back a moan as his clothes pulled at the sticky congealing blood that stretched from one side of his stomach to the other. “It’s just a scratch,” he murmured as he felt cool fingers probing the red raw edges of skin, “I thought it was something more, but it’s just a scratch.”

 

“It’s more than a scratch, Lieutenant!” Face closed his eyes at the anger in that voice, “It’s carved a trough out of you all the way across!” The first aid kit was already out on the back seat from where Murdock had been cleaning Hannibal up a little, and the colonel grabbed the antiseptic spray now, not even bothering to warn Face of the impending burning as he sprayed liberal amounts of the stuff all across his stomach.

 

The reawakening of the pain was making Face feel sick, so he laid back on the seats of the car, his arm across his eyes and let Hannibal treat him, feeling the rough dabbing of the wipes cleaning him up, then the tugging of steri-strips being placed over the deepest parts of the cut, tugging the raw skin back together, then, blissfully, the antiseptic cream with local anaesthetic, cooling and then numbing the fire, and finally the top dressing being taped into place across his skin, those fingers that knew him so well, smoothing and skimming over his burning flesh.

 

Hannibal stopped, and Face gave him a moment before removing the arm from over his eyes and looking up, taking the offered hand and letting the boss haul him back into a sitting position. He looked up, past where the boss as standing with folded arms looking down at him, into three pairs of accusing eyes, and looked down again. The sooner the others left the better as far as he was concerned.

 

“Hey, dick-head,” Face looked back at Sasha, wondering what he’d done to incur the kid’s anger this time, “are we ready to go yet or what?”

 

Face risked a glance at Hannibal’s blank face and then hauled himself to his feet, “Sure, Sasha, no time like the present, eh?”

 

He stepped around Hannibal and walked to the boy’s side, tugging his clothes back into place as he did so.

 

“Hang on,” Murdock stepped forward and took hold of his arm, “Go? Go where, Face?”

 

Face took a deep breath and fixed Murdock with a bright smile, “I’m gonna stay on here with Sasha and the kids for a few days, bud,” he answered. “See if I can sort them out with somewhere a little better to stay.”

 

Murdock looked at him and then over at Hannibal’s inscrutable expression and then back at Face, “You sure that’s a good idea, Facey?” he asked, ever mindful of Sasha standing listening, “I mean, when you are injured an’ all?”

 

Face let out a long breath, “It’s just a scratch, Murdock...!”

 

There was a long pause before Murdock turned back to Hannibal, “Boss?”

 

No one moved. Face held his breath, already wondering what he should do when Hannibal told him he couldn’t stay, if Hannibal ordered him to return with them...

 

But to his surprise, the boss just nodded and walked over to the car, “It’s just a scratch, captain. Let him do what he needs to do, he’ll be back in a few days.”

 

Cold fingers of shock clenched Face’s stomach and he narrowed his eyes at Hannibal, that he had not expected while Murdock looked from Hannibal to Face and back again incredulously, “But, boss!” he sputtered, “we...”

 

“No buts!” Hannibal snapped folding himself into the back of the car, “Get your stuff into the boot, captain, we have a plane to catch.”

 

Murdock looked back over at Face, confusion etched into his expression, then sighed and wandered morosely over to a little stack of weapons and ammo that was still piled up by the chain link fence, Face meanwhile stood stock still, staring at the side of Hannibal’s head in the car as he cleared away the mess left from the medical kit. BA started the car’s engine and Face found his feet taking him to the still open car door on their own violation. “Boss...” he whispered, embarrassed that it came out sounding like a plea.

 

“What?” Hannibal snapped looking round at him.

 

Face froze at the expression on the boss’ face. Hurt, disappointment, anger, it was all there. He suspects me... Face thought in horror and took a step back.    

 

Hannibal’s expression darkened even further as Face stepped back from him and he turned away to watch Murdock sliding into the front of the car.

 

“Boss...” Face tried again, not even sure what he was asking for, for Hannibal to fight for him? For the boss to put his foot down and own him? Anything really, he thought, anything would be better than this cold indifference as he was just left behind, never mind that it was what he had wanted, exactly what he’d asked the boss to do. His hand reached out for the door just as Hannibal snatched it away from his fingers, slamming it shut, putting a metal and glass barrier up alongside the emotional ones.   

 

Murdock’s head stuck out of the window, looking back at Face in concern. “Come back with us, buddy!” he implored, “An’ as soon as the boss is feeling better we can put some leave in an’ all come out here to help the kids!”

 

Face didn’t even get chance to reply, he could hear Hannibal’s voice, etched in sorrow, through Murdock’s open window, “He needs to get some things straight in his head, HM, before he can come back with me. It’s best if we let him do this his own way.”

 

Face opened his mouth to say something, but no words came into his head. His hand was still reaching out for the car door when BA pressed the gas and they surged forward, out of his reach. He took a step forward, feeling the bond between him and Hannibal stretching like a huge elastic band. The boss was looking back at him through the rear view window and Face met his eyes, just as Hannibal looked away. He could almost hear the sharp ‘snap’ of elastic...

 

And within five minutes the sound of the car’s engine had died away as the team headed off to meet their extraction team, but Face was still standing staring up the road after them.

 

“So,” Sasha said walking to Face’s side and looking up at him, “that’s why you didn’t tell them you were hurt, you thought they would make you go back with them?”

 

Face let out a long breath and turned away, “They would never have done that, kiddo,” he answered, laying a hand on Sasha’s shoulder. “Come on, let’s get the others and get going. We’ve got a long journey ahead of us.”

 

He reached down to pat the two envelopes in the pockets of his combats, and allowed himself a grim smile; he just had one call to make before they left Magadan.

 

________________________________

 

Murdock started shoving empty take out boxes into a carrier bag and throwing the used cutlery into the dishwasher in Hannibal and Face’s tiny galley kitchen. It was good to be back, good to see the boss looking far more human now he had some antibiotics in his system, but the atmosphere between him and BA, no, not good, not good at all.

 

He was also kicking himself for not staying behind in Russia to help Face out. It had all been so rushed, all come as such a surprise, it was only when they were in their silent car, thirty miles out of Magadan before that thought had even occurred to him, and by then it was far too late.

 

He heard a noise behind him and turned, finding BA standing in the doorway, stack of empty cans in his arms and a sheepish expression on his face. “You wan’ some help here?” Murdock shook his head tersely, lips pressed together in a thin line and turned back to the mess. “Boss is in bed,” BA offered awkwardly, “Says we can crash here if we want...”

 

“I’ll take the couch,” Murdock snapped, using a piece of kitchen paper to wipe the splashed curry sauce off the worktops.

 

BA sighed and dumped the cans in the recycling box, leaning up against the door frame with his arms folded, “How long you gonna be mad at me for, Murdock?” he asked quietly, “It’s not my fault that fool stayed behind.”

 

Murdock turned on him, “That’s enough, Bosco! Don’t you think you done enough damage already? Accusing him of hurting Anya? Pushin’ him all the time ‘til he can’t take you anymore? What if he never comes back?”

 

BA rolled his eyes dramatically, “Yeah, as if that would ever happen! What is he without the boss? He’s like a leech, Murdock, sucking that guy dry! Goddamn parasite!”

 

The silence in the kitchen was heavy, “You really think that?” Murdock asked slowly and BA nodded. The anger all seemed to drain out of Murdock in one go, “Then you are a fool yourself BA, and I pity you!” They stared at each other as BA’s forehead pulled into a frown. “Don’t you see it?” Murdock took a step forward, “They love each other, Bosco! Love! Real, honest to god, simple, love! Yes, Hannibal makes Face calmer and stronger, better even, but don’t you see how that works both ways? What Face does for the boss?”

 

BA frowned at him, “He does nothin’ for the boss, ‘cept take advantage of him! And one o’ these days he’s gonna make a move on a general or somethin’ an’ where’s that gonna leave the boss? Pinin’ over some damn fool whore that was never good enough for him in the firs’ place!”

 

“You’re wrong,” Murdock shook his head vehemently, “Face loves Hannibal with everything he has, he would never do anything like that to hurt him.”

 

BA stepped forward, “No, fool, you’re wrong! You musta heard what everyone says about him? All his sleepin’ around, shaggin’ anythin’ that moves, no respect for anyone?” Murdock frowned, “You think that’s all lies? Well, you know the first time I met Face? The boss damn well shot me so we could pull his worthless hide outta the mess he’d got himself in by sleeping with Tuco’s wife! You know that, crazy? And then, even while we was still tryin’ to get away from them, what was he doin’? Makin’ out with her in the back of my van - right in front of the boss! You still think he loves him? Nah, he’s jus’ usin’ him, Murdock, just to get what he wants! An’ Hannibal? He’s the best man I ever met. The faith he showed me, gettin’ me back in the Rangers, turnin’ my life round?” He shook his head slowly, “He deserves more than that sack of shit, tha’s for sure!”

 

“All that means nothin’,” Murdock answered quietly, “All them rumours about Facey? Lies, BA, lies that Face encourages ‘cause it keeps eyes off him and the boss! Lies that have suckered you! And I admit that I have no idea what crazy plan the two of them had cooked up to get rid of Tuco, but I do know that they love each other. It’s the real thing, Bosco, and Face needs the boss just as much as the boss needs him. You need to get off his back, you need to open your eyes and you need to see Face for what he really is, don't let him fool you with one of those false fronts he uses on other people!”

 

BA rubbed his hands over his face. He was tired of this argument, he was tired of all this tension and he was tired of Face driving a wedge in between him and Murdock when maybe things were turning into something just a little bit more.

 

A cool hand on his arm brought his eyes up and he found Murdock right in front of him, his eyes beseeching, “I know you see it sometimes, big guy, don’t you? When Face thought he had to leave the boss behind in that attic to go and help the kids, you saw it then? How much it cost him? And you sent him back, yeah?” BA nodded slowly remembering the look of agony on the LT’s face that had cut him to the core. “He feels it, BA, he’s not a whore or a charlatan an’ he’s not sleepin’ his way up the ranks. He loves the boss, he really does, you need to see it...”

 

It was late, BA was exhausted and this whole sorry saga needed putting to bed, “Okay,” he whispered, “As soon as he gets back I’ll try. Jus’ for you, I’ll try an’ see it different,” and Murdock’s answering smile was all the payment he needed.

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